Wednesday, September 2, 2009

[Insert Title Here]

Note: This will not make sense.

I guess you could say things are starting to look up. I feel so blessed to have the people I have in my life. Honestly, where would i be without them? --Let's not answer that question. Yes? Good! So, these last couple of weeks have been less than desirable. Depression is really nothing to joke about. Depression is everyday life for me; it's real. My small group leader, and great friend, summed up my feelings for depression in a few short words: "Depression is like a hug from an old friend..." And to be completely honest, it is. It's what i know best. Even when things are great, I always know in the back of my mind that things can't stay this good forever. It's just this ominous cloud following closely behind waiting for me to trip, to quickly catch up and make me feel inferior for a while.
I thank God for the friends i have every night. I'm glad they feel they can trust me with everything. But some times it's just too much for me. I love helping my friends, I really do, but sometimes I feel as if people expect way too much from me; I'M ONLY ONE PERSON! Not only does the pressure to always have it together effect me mentally, but physically. Through this whole ordeal, i have not been able to have a good nights sleep in over 4 months and on top of that, I'm just barely starting to eat how i used to. Yes, things are getting better, but it's still going to take some time. I guess that's all I can ask for, right? Cool.

2 comments:

  1. Jon, this makes more sense than you know :\

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  2. zach, if you ever need to talk, call me. honestly. you may think your the only one who needs to talk, but we need it just as much.

    ReplyDelete